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a downward spiral is only a pirouette
13 January 2010 @ 09:33 pm

hi! you might also know me on livejournal as [info]toomuchtochew, although I rarely use that journal anymore.

this journal is friends only. it sometimes contains things such as mentions of self-harm and weight, which could be triggering for some people.

add me. I don't bite!

a downward spiral is only a pirouette
29 November 2009 @ 08:36 am

do you believe in something beautiful? then get up & be itCollapse )

you are all beautiful people. don't ever forget that.

a downward spiral is only a pirouette
16 November 2009 @ 08:19 pm

So, I returned yesterday from Equine Affaire in Massachusets. It was really, really fun. The conferences were excellent and the shopping was great. The eating, however...

Let's just say I didn't stick to the plan. AT ALL. I ate as healthy as possible (hard when you're eating at cheap restaurants in the USA), but my eating wasn't exactly portion controllled. More like portion uncontrolled or portion out-of-controlled. Still, you walk ALL DAY there, so it was great exercise and I lost one pound. Which was 0.1 pounds away from my goal of 119. So if I'm careful today, that goal shall be achieved tomorrow.

a downward spiral is only a pirouette
11 November 2009 @ 05:42 am
I've now got the new LiveJournal Messenger. My Windows Live ID is fille_qui_court@livejournal.com. Sign up now and we can chat!
a downward spiral is only a pirouette
10 November 2009 @ 10:19 pm

The perfect body belongs to

sweetparamour. I am so jealous. She is gorgeous. She's 5 feet 6 inches and 115 pounds, with a BMI of 18.5. To have the same BMI, I'd have to weigh 106 pounds. 14 pounds to go.
Here are some photos of her.


mood: jealousjealous
a downward spiral is only a pirouette
10 November 2009 @ 10:05 pm

So today I started my Skinny By Christmas diet. I'm going to think of it as a Christmas present to myself: the gift of beauty.

Today I ate around 1000 calories (had to estimate the fish). I feel really nauseous, which makes no sense (how can not eating make you nauseous?). Also, my nose is currently bleeding and the blood is dripping down my throat. Wonderful.

Tomorrow will be tough because I'm headed to Springfield, Massachusetts for horse conferences (4 days of hoses nonstop! Cool!), which means a 6 hour car drive. WITH CHIPS. So I might skip breakfast and lunch. That way I can snack and still stay under my limit.

Once I get to the conferences, it'll be great. I'll be busy, so I won't think about food, and I will be standing up or walking 6 to 8 hours a day for 4 days. That means a lot of extra calories burnt. I weighed 120.0 today. I wonder what I'll weigh Monday morning when I get back? I'm hoping for under 119.

mood: crappycrappy
a downward spiral is only a pirouette
06 November 2009 @ 06:49 am

I think I've put on some weight. I weigh more than I ever have before, but I'm not at my fattest because I have gained quite a bit of muscle. The culprit of the gain (2-5 pounds, probably) is most likely Halloween, and the fact that my headaches are so bad that I would rather shoot myself than do exercise (or anything other than sleeping).

Any ideas on what I could do to get rid of migranes (other than advil or tylenol)?

a downward spiral is only a pirouette
06 November 2009 @ 05:41 am

Yesterday was a pretty good day. Math was fun, english wasn't so bad, and I had a one hour riding lesson, plus another hour of theory. We learnt stuff that was super basic, like how to brush a horse. It was pretty boring; I've known that stuff for at least four years. But the actual horseback riding was fun.

I had a science test , and I think I did okay (high eighties/low nineties?) considering it was pretty challenging. I can't wait to find out my grade.

Now for a picspam of my pony Mika, just because.

photosCollapse )

Tags: ,
mood: sleepy
a downward spiral is only a pirouette
05 November 2009 @ 08:41 pm

Today, I looked at the calendar and saw that between this coming Friday and Christmas, there are exactly 50 days. So I decided to make a list of goals for between now and Christmas.

1. Run 30 km.
2. Run 1 km in 4 minutes 45 seconds or less.
3. Get my grades up (for me, 83% is a pathetic failure).
4. Go shopping (I practically have no clothes; they're all too big for me! Yay weight loss!).
5. Convince my parents to let me get an ear stud (I love piercings).

where am i: in the bus
mood: cheerfulcheerful
i'm listenin' to: Taylor-Jack Johnson
a downward spiral is only a pirouette
04 November 2009 @ 09:26 pm

So... My day could be resumed in one word: stressful. The first stressful thing was that my alarm didn't go off and I hardly had any time to get ready, so my hair looked like shit. Then, we got our math tests back and I got an (drumroll please...) 83 percent! Crapcrapcrap. That most definitely did not make my day. I knew I'd done badly, but still. It didn't have to be confirmed to me that I'm stupid.
Stressful thing #3 was that my parents announced that we won't be home Sunday, the day I had been planning to work on a science project. Hopefully I'll be able to get it done and not hand it in late. Then, last but not least, my parents announced that my grandparents (who live in Florida) want to take us to Disney World. Although most people would be thrilled, I find that this really sucks because
a) it means I won't get any other birthday presents from them (like as in cool stuff I actually want
b) I hate Disney and all that it stands for
c) I would be willing to bet that eating ovo-vegetarian (no meat or dairy) there will be hell
d) being seen in a bikini right now is something I'd rather not think about

Let me explain that last one. In second grade, my best friend threw up all over me. This caused me to become phobic about throwing up, and other people throwing up on/around/near me. And people throw up at amusement parks. A LOT. Plus, I find rides totally suck. I hate them. Thirdly, the combination of the smell of fried grease, noisy crowds and the hot sun gives me huge migraines. Which is not cool.

So, all in all, I really, really do not want to go to disney world.

And I want to cut myself. Great.

mood: stressedstressed
a downward spiral is only a pirouette
01 November 2009 @ 07:58 pm

Name: Sophie
Age: 13
Grade: secondary 2

Hi, I'm a runner, a reader, a horseback rider and a dreamer. I love all sorts of music, anything form Eva Cassidy to Fall Out Boy to Snow Patrol. I'm smart and have really good grades (92% average). My goal is to get more in shape: at the moment, I can only run 6 km in a row, I'm aiming for 10 or 11. I love the color purple. I don't have many friends on LJ, so add me if I seem interesting!

What communities in LJ do you think I would like? I need suggestions :)

mood: hopefulhopeful
a downward spiral is only a pirouette
01 November 2009 @ 06:41 pm

Images that I found & I love.